Made the JUMP!! The SPLASH!! Whatever you want to call it...

Yep, we did it. What do you ask? Joshua is going to counseling for his anxiety, anger and most definately his seperation issues. We've been trying to do this "on our own" (sorta) since day one......with the kind help of an organization that helps only until the bugger is three then they are left to the school district if the school district feels there is a need, called First Steps. Well, to say the least, First Steps did help "SOMEWHAT" but it was soonafter that he was back to his ways of doing what he knew best.....survival in his world.

Joshua has only had 2, count 'em, two appointments with Ms. X so far. First appt went very very well. Too well I might think. But now I think the lil guy is figuring out that we want him to talk and he's not having too much of a part of it....he just wants to play with her toys....all of them. He did communicate to some level....but not much eye contact was made (like it was the first time we were there....man, he was on target then) and certainly he was pushing her away when she wanted to talk to him about something more than just the toy he was playing with. He also didn't like the fact that she DID NOT have any Thomas trains....how dare she....LOL!!!!! I really felt for her and my dear child.....I WANT things to go well.....I WANT him to communicate so that he can start to feel better about things......I WANT him to start to feel better about himself.....oh yeah.....she said that his "need" to win at EVERYTHING and EVERYTIME is a lack of self-confidence in himself....that he doesn't feel good about himself....OUCH! That one hurt. My son doesn't feel good about HIMSELF? WOW.....what an eye-opener for me. I always saw the laughing, funny, easy-going kiddo and thought sure, he's got some issues, but never for a second did I feel that he lacked for that. Don't get me wrong here......I feel awful about the other issues as well.....just wasn't prepared for that one.



Now.....how do we get to a place where he can self-regulate? Where he can not be so sensitive to all things in his world? Maybe he just has to learn to deal? I know that I REALLY need to educate myself on a few issues and things before we go much further. I do KNOW this to be true....there is TRUE hope in Jesus and I'll be teaching that to that lil guy.

We are planning on making a "Story of Joshua" and "The Story of Our Family" together.....all of us together....daddy too.....Mr. Crafty himself....LOL. Ms. X thinks this will help Joshua.....why? Can't really remember at the moment. I was too worried about Joshua being in the other room....alone. What was he thinking? Was he scared as he usually is? I really should be listening to Ms. X, but my sweet Joshua is 25' away from me....and he's....A-L-L alone!! WOW....he did it....he made it in the room all alone....I'm so proud of my lil man!!!!!! You see, Joshua can't go into a room alone.....hardly ever. AND HE DID IT!!!!! In a practically unfamiliar place too! I'm one proud mama bird!! I wanna see those wings spread and fly someday soon!!!!!  

~Tina