Concerned, naturally, I asked why Joshua didn't want to turn 4 the next day. He said, "When I turn 4, I'll lose mommy and daddy." and he started to cry. Of course I turned off the video right away to comfort my lil man.
Whatever I could do to fix that sweet & innocent lil guy's heart, I'd do it in a heartbeat! But this time, I couldn't. All I could do was hold him, try my hardest to comfort him and tell him repeatedly how much he won't lose mommy and daddy when he turned 4 or any time at all!
I do believe this all started quite a few weeks ago when I was talking to the FM (Foster Mother)'s daughter on Facebook and she stated that they'd LOVE to speak with Joshua via phone to hear his sweet voice once again. I spoke with Joshua about this and he stated that yes, he'd like to speak with the FM as well. I honestly think that once lil man started to process the whole thing, he thought he'd have to go back to Guatemala forever. I don't know what ever made him think that, but kids get wild things in their heads sometimes.
If you remember, in a post a bit ago, I spoke of how Joshua is VERY CLINGY to me, especially when I drop him off for preschool. I literally have to have someone pry him off of me to leave to go to work. I hate doing that to him but financially speaking, we need for me to work right now. I SO wish I could stay home with the lil guy and get him through this......but it just isn't feasible. Too many bills. Dang it. BUT, I will say this, I'm seriously considering taking him to see a counselor soon, very soon. Poor kiddo. I just gotta get dh on track too. I think he's getting there after this last comment about losing us though.
Well, keep lil man in your prayers.....he needs them. We do, too. I'm doing a lot of reading to find out what I can do to help. But there has to be something more......I feel like there is a missing piece to this puzzle. I won't ever give up hope or trying. Not on that lil man.....ever.
~Tina
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